The whole world is a tight skirt

כל העולם כולו גשר צר מאד והעיקר לא לפחד כלל
Kol ha-olam kulo, gesher tzar m'od, v'ha-ikar lo l'fached klal

You may know this traditional Jewish song, which translates:
All the world is a very narrow bridge; the central thing is not to be afraid at all.

This is an entry some of my friends have been waiting for-- my explanation for wearing skirts rather than slacks. I have various reasons, and I've realized that the central thing for me to remember is that there's no need for fear. No structural change in my personality is taking place; my skirt is a bridge to help me across this valley of religious questioning where I find myself.

The inspiration for this entry is my study partner at Nishmat, the Center for Advanced Jewish Studies for Women. She's 24, worked at the Washington Post for the past two years, has a wicked sense of humor, and a couple of weeks ago when we went jogging together, she wore her skirt, a pretty tight one. Now, I've worn a skirt nearly every day since arriving here in August, but I draw the line when it comes to exercise. Unwillingness to wear track pants on a run for religious reasons seems extreme. Sometimes it feels contradictory, but it completely depends on my operative rationale at the time. A religious Israeli woman told me that Americans like myself are experts at compartmentalizing in this way. For her, if wearing pants is considered immodest, then it's also considered immodest when you're out to get a cardio workout. That's a clear and simple way of looking at it. Be things what they may, I don't foresee such clarity in my own religious practice too soon.

In Israel, dress code is indeed a code. It's a complicated one. Anyone who's wondered about the symbolism of a young soldier's army unit t-shirt, or tried to figure out why another guy is wearing silk stockings and a fur cap in the desert would guess this. For a Jewish woman, a skirt can be what a head covering can be for a Jewish man, a public symbol that the wearer practices an orthodox Judaism or associates with an orthodox community. Since arriving in Israel in August, I've worn skirts rather than slacks, as a reminder of my personal expectations for daily prayer and spiritual awareness, to conform to the norms of modesty in the Modern Orthodox community, and so that I am welcome/feel comfortable in a synagogue and all the neighborhoods of Jerusalem. It began as a sensible decision based on these rationales, but I already feel habituated to the physical feeling of wearing a skirt, and I already feel uncomfortably self-conscious to wear slacks in public.

So then how is a tight skirt a narrow bridge? A bridge is a structure that enables one to get across risky waters safely to the next leg of the journey. Most likely, the bridge was built by those who previously scouted out the land, and set it up to help those who would cross it in the future. That is what I envision this chameleon clothing doing for me. For these years of serious questioning, I can go undercover in religious communities, feel approval from those who would otherwise be disapproving at moments when I am unsure of myself, and, most importantly, feel a physical reminder that I am consciously undertaking a personal evolution. Religious questioning can be risky. But many have crossed this way before. By keeping my skirt below-the-knee, I feel safe; wherever I look in Jerusalem, I am in uniform. By keeping my skirt tight,* I remind myself of my rich, secular heritage, the value I place in individuation and personal style, my intention to cross this isthmus and one day wear pants without feeling self-conscious or uncomfortable.

To be fair, in the past month, one friend gave me her floor-length black flamenco skirt after upgrading to a "real" flamenco skirt and another friend gave me two cute below-the-knee skirts that her boyfriend felt would cause people to mistakenly identify her as someone "religious." So I can't say there aren't material benefits to this decision...

To be continued:
Reasons cited in rabbinic law for Jewish women wearing skirts rather than slacks.

An easy fast

Everyone at the table of our seudah mavseket, the meal before starting the Yom Kippur fast, vegetarians and non-vegetarians alike, agreed that this was the easiest fast they can remember, so I thought I'd share the contents of our very simple spread. Maybe someone with knowledge of nutrition can clue us in to the magic of this combination? Maybe it was just the cool Jerusalem night?

challah
hummus
matbucha (spicy Moroccan tomato salsa)
chilbe (bitter Yemenite fenugreek salsa)

baked ginger tofu
seasoned brown rice
egg salad-chopped boiled eggs with nonfat yogurt, olive oil, salt, pepper, and paprika
spinach salad with brie and grilled peaches
baby tomato and soaked onion salad with tahini-honey dressing

pomegranate juice
water